Twilight: New Moon

6 02 2010

Honestly, i just don’t understand what all the hub-bub is about. I can’t understand why there are fanatical fans of this series, nor can i understand why there are fervent detractors. OOOooo, a movie about vampires, what a great new concept. People didn’t freak out when Interview With a Vampire or Transylvania 6-5000 came out and they were both better flicks.

Apparently in the Twilight series there is a romantic subcontext i haven’t yet discovered. Usually i tend to sleep through the mushier parts. This second Twilight release was a little more aggressive, gory, racy. As is standard with movie series, the second movie is generally the crappiest, but with the most filthiness. This time around the Vampires aren’t just fighting their own temptations and other Vampires, they’re fighting Werewolves, but in Twilight they go by the name “Dark Wooflers“. Of course furthering this, the third film features an even greater enemy who threatens to take out both Vamp and Were. Vanquish foes, join forces, invent new conflict. The third is always the greatest enemy of all- man (remember when they tried to kill the X-men in that 3rd film?). . . . This flick even has baby Vampires, its ridiculous! . . .All of this can be verified when i actually see these movies. . . . .I know a fair bit about this type of thing.

Rating: B-





All About Steve

15 12 2009

Ughh…Alright so i watched some Sandra Bullock movie. Dr. Johnny Fever was in it as her dad, which was cool, but there wasn’t a ton more to expect. . . .The usual crap where Demi is the main character and she’s all crazy and neurotic at first having awkward exchanges with men in elevators and such. Then we find out she’s not just crazy, she has some talent- in this case it was trivia knowledge. Being a brainiac and endearing qualities take Julia from nuts to eccentric. Another movie where the message is that its OK to be different (just as long as you compromise and become like everyone else). . .All these movies about nothing have a few specified characteristics to try and give them some depth. You know, two boggle champions fall in love, or the hero is obsessed with her purse or some shit. In this flick you can look forward to boots and crossword puzzle writing.

Jim Smetchland’s Rating: C








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